[[이름] essay]Do you think our society is too dependent on technology like smartphones? Why or why n

Hello. Marie. I'm really happy to meet you at first time today. I think that we are dependent on technology too much. We don't live without smartphones or SNS, specially young people. I have same situation, too. Young people are watch the display of own smartphone in everywhere. Therefore, their sociality is decreasing more and more in the actual society, not online society.

Hello [이름]! It was also a delight talking with you. You have a very sweet voice. :) Thanks for doing your homework. You shared some really good thoughts about this topic, however, I would like you to take note of the sentence structure. Please check the corrections that I gave you below. Make sure you understand them. :)   Ciao!   ~Teacher Marie~   Hello. Marie.>> Hello, Marie! I\'m really happy to meet you at first time today.>> I\'m really happy to meet you for the first time today. OR >> I\'m really happy to meet you. I think that we are dependent on technology too much.>> I think that we are too dependent on technology. We don\'t live without smartphones or SNS, specially young people.>> We can\'t live without our smartphones or social media sites, especially young people. I have same situation, too.>> I am in the same situation too. Young people are watch the display of own smartphone in everywhere.>> Young people just look at their smartphones everywhere they go. OR >> Young people are busy looking at their smartphones everywhere they go. Therefore, their sociality is decreasing more and more in the actual society, not online society. >> Therefore, they don\'t do any offline socialization anymore. OR >> Therefore, their social skills are decreasing.